I'm protective of my child, like any mother, "protective" being a relative term, of course. After he was born, I hibernated with my little angel. I didn't want many visitors and didn't dare take him anywhere but the doctor's office. Nearly 8 weeks passed before we blessed him at church. Even sharing him with grandparents was difficult.
16 months later I still love to be with him constantly. He's never been "left" with anyone but grandparents once or twice, and then briefly. We haven't been anxious to get a babysitter, yet--not even on our annivesary! Many kind and trustworthy people have offered to look after M, we just haven't felt any need to be away from him. I suppose we've been waiting for something, you know, critical to necessitate a babysitter.
Well, critical circumstances arose and I was obliged to take Heidi's offer to look after M. I mean, what could be more important than my hair? This is an actual emergency, isn't it? This is a critical circumstance?
We headed off to Heidi's with a carefully packed back of necessities and treats for sharing, and my cell phone number on a giant post-it note. Is there some sort of kid-sharing etiquette I should know about, I wondered? I called B from the car to be reassured that I wasn't being selfish. I said a silent prayer that M wouldn't be naughty. We went in, he immediately busied himself, and took no notice of my quick skedaddle out the door. All during my appointment (with "Sweeney Bob") I kept my cell phone on my lap, just in case he got a concussion or scratched someone's eye out or was frantic with missing his mommy. Or something perfectly reasonable like that.
When I picked him up, gave me a smile and a brief hug, then ran back to playing. He didn't want to leave! He hadn't even known I was gone! Heidi assured me that he'd been happy and sweet the whole 2 hours. Whew! But still, didn't he miss me just a little bit? My constant sidekick day in and day out? Do I need to get cooler toys at our house? Does he not love me? Completely rational thoughts, I tell you.
I suppose I'm grateful that he is a content and happy kid, but, deep down inside somewhere lies a tender, irrational mommy-nerve that wishes a teensy weensy little bit that he had been a teensy weensy bit sad. Crazy mommy thoughts. M's survival of the first babysitting wasn't ever really in question. Mine however, was, and survive I did, with only a few flutters of mommy angst. Still wondering if we need cooler toys...
6 comments:
Guilt or jealousy? Been there and wondered, "Hmm, does the child not need to throw a fit to communicate how much they need and love us?" Don't worry, the temper tantrums will come and they all seem to hit about the time they're supposed to go into nursery and they last for at least 6 months!
he seriously didn't want to come home with me! 2 more months until nursery...we'll see. It will surely be more difficult for me than for him though it will be nice to teach YW without chasing him the whole hour!
Raising a child that feels loved enough not to freak out when you're not there every second is a sign of success in my opinion! =)
Fun blogs... Just wait a few years and then they start telling you to go out so they can have a babysitter! But by that point, you think that sounds like a mighty fine idea! Makes everyone happy.
and then one day you'll have a kid old and responsible enough to watch the others and you can pay them less, go out, worry a little about the house burning down, and have your kids asking you to go out more often.
Just wait until the first day of preschool when he'll run in without so much as a backward glance at you, {after he's told you to stay in the car and he can take it from there}. Now that's just a heart breaking scenario. I'm just saying, you know, in theory.
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